Ever go to a restaurant and struggle to explain to the server that you need everything gluten and dairy free? I know exactly how you feel. Except for a select few, restaurants are wonderfully grand at making me feel like my food intolerance is a devastating symptom of being a different species. I have even gotten the reaction: “what is gluten?” from my waiter. Dude, really? I know you’re just here to make a paycheck, but you work in the food industry. Come on. Not only is it difficult to eat out, but it can sometimes be quite embarrassing.

From 10 years of gluten and dairy intolerance, I have learned the hard way how to have a particular dialogue with my server. One time, I went to a restaurant in Fredericksburg, Texas. Rustic little country place that I had never been to. Speaking to the waitress, I gestured to the salmon over brown rice, asking, “Is there any dairy in this?” She skimmed it over and said, “No, there is not.” When it arrived, I started eating and it tasted absolutely delectable. Almost.. too delectable. I tried to discern what the flavor was – Aha! Something creamy and salty! Wait.. “There has to be butter in here.. There is no way this rice can taste that good.” I thought. But she said there was no dairy in this meal, so I should be safe, right?

The waitress came back and asked how everything was. “Great!” I said, “Just a quick question; is there butter in the rice?” She looked at me, puzzled. “Yes, I believe so.” My stomach dropped as I looked down at my half eaten meal. I had no Lactaid in my purse (my fault), and unless I wanted to partake in temporary bulimia, there was no way to fight this. In that moment, I realized I could react one of two ways. One, get extremely upset and demand my meal for free. Or two, sit quietly and say nothing, because it is not her fault that she’s ignorant. I reluctantly chose the latter. That night, I had all of hell to pay. All plans were canceled and the toilet was my best friend. It’s incredible how butter can ruin your vacation.

There have been a few other instances like this, like when they slip gorgonzola on my salads and I have to send the thing back and wait another 10 minutes, but sometimes I go to a place that has exceptional service where I meet exceptional people. I have even met a few chef’s – who come out of the kitchen to talk with me about my needs. Some even gave me their business cards, saying I should call them if I go again. Those small acts of kindness definitely make me feel like the good kind of “special.”

Here is what you need to know when you order at a restaurant:

1. Be direct and honest. For whatever reason you are eating dairy, gluten, soy, or whatever free, make sure you TELL them why. For example, I usually say: “Could you help me? I am looking for something completely dairy and gluten free because I am dairy and gluten intolerant.” I don’t care if you say something like “I’ll get the runs.” Just make sure you tell them why you can’t have a specific thing.
2. If, at this point, the server takes a minute to ponder the menu, chime in and give the specifics: “As in no butter, cream, cheese, milk, or bread.” It paints the picture for them when they are considering the best choice for you.
3. If they say “I don’t think there is any dairy or gluten in this meal…” Stop them right there and ask if they can double-check with the right person. I have had many times where the server says “You should be fine with this.” But when I ask if they can double-check they say, “Actually, there was cheese sprinkled on top.” Most people just don’t think about something small like that because they don’t have to experience any pain by consuming it. Just the nature of the beast.
4. Even when you’ve followed steps 1-3, taste your food and look for any unfamiliar (or familiar) tastes that resemble dairy, gluten, soy, or whatever it is you need to avoid. Don’t be afraid to ask one more time when your server comes back to check on you. “This tastes really good – you’re sure there is no gluten or dairy in it? Something this good can’t be gluten and dairy free!” Make a joke out of it. This step is important because people are human and can make mistakes. It is always worth asking one more time, if you have doubts.

Bottom line is this: Who cares if you seem needy and over analyzing? It is your stomach and body. If those around you (and I mean anyone) doesn’t respect that, then forget them.

Below I have made a list of restaurants where I have had quality serving experiences in Houston, Texas. Each of these places have taken the time to understand the nature of my specific food intolerance by talking with me extensively and making me feel safe. As a result, each has secured my trust for the years to come. If you live in Houston, or ever visit, I am sure they will take care of you the same way:

• Woodbar – Montrose area. Any dietary needs you have, just tell them. This is a very neat little coffee, cocktail, lunch, and dinner place with a sophisticated, rustic atmosphere. The staff knows their menu and is very accommodating. You are guaranteed to be taken care of.
• Grand Lux Cafe – Galleria area. (Chef actually came out to meet me. Had a wonderful steak and veggies).
• Auntie Pasto’s – Bellaire area. (Great little Italian place where they have wonderful gluten free pasta with Marinara meat sauce. Tell them as soon as you arrive because it takes longer to prepare.)
• Down House – Heights area. (“Austin feel” coffee bar restaurant for those of you looking for a lax, atmospheric restaurant. From breakfast to dinner, they get it).
• Thai Cottage – Bellaire, Richmond , and Katy area. Best Thai food in Houston, I kid you not. (Curries are made with coconut milk and pad thai with egg or rice noodles).
•  La Guadalupana Bakery & Cafe – Montrose area. (Hole in the wall Mexican food. Best coffee in Houston, without a doubt, and breakfast options are easy to find gluten and dairy free. I usually get the migas or juevos racheros with corn tortillas, or chicken tostadas with no cream or cheese. They’re also dog friendly).
• Ruggles Green – River Oaks area. (American style cuisine where all burgers you can make gluten and dairy free (they have a tasty gluten free bun). Pizza’s can be made gluten and dairy free as well. Absolutely love this restaurant).
• Pink’s Pizza – Bellaire area. (Speaking of pizza, Pink’s has a dairy and gluten free pizza that is very yummy. It is a bit expensive ($20-$30 for one large), but it might be worth it when you don’t feel like cooking).
• Max’s Wine Dive – Houston and San Antonio area. (They make a mean gluten free fried chicken. It’s also dairy free! Ha, I had to follow steps 1-4 to confirm that because it was so damn delicious).
• P.F. Chang’s – Galleria area. (They have a whole section on their menu for gluten free. Every time I have been, their staff knows exacty what is in their food. 5 star rating and reasonably priced Asian cuisine. One of my top favorites).

I will keep adding to this list in the future. Let me know if you have any questions.

Thank you for reading!

 

One last laugh.